It so tricksy to comment without being "holier than thou".
We foster so many kids in reality.. from all walk of life. Some long term// some short term.
We have then a decent inkling of what make a child tick.. but we still caught out at times. Wayne came close..to beating us. He truanted badly. We almost end up in bother over it. I post on PH while I wait for him to get ready (It now a morning coffee habit

) I take him to register. Mad Doc und William (if home from Uni) und the twins on the alert to nab at the other exit
We enrol at same school as our own twins .. it made a difference to this child... to have real discipline und an interest in his work. He now about to qualify with the initial requirement to train as a proper Corgi plumber.

He also want to learn beyond.. he do IAM course

und ask me und Ted to bankroll him for an OU degree course which we do as he part of this family now.
but each child different .. you learn as constant. You cannot let yourself be "surprised" by anything.
Rigpig wrote:
WildCat wrote:
But ist a tricky one. We once posted in defence of McCann couple that we seen worse parenting skills than theirs in the resorts up here. This one of these cases we had in mind at the time.
This is one case I had in mind too, the McCanns do not cut an image of typical 'bad parents' do they?
Two things disturb me about their case:
a. Gerry McCann in particular cannot bring himself to admit that what they did was irresponsible. The best he can muster is 'naive'. Arrogance? I certainly think so.
Perhaps. Perhaps a mix of both. We in odd situation as we know of this guy's actual work professionally ..
He train at Glasgow. Ted train at St Andrews/Manchester.
We attend socials for Scottish trained medics as results. I think I twirled a reel with them once. I do not forget faces.

IG think I should be a

for this.
It odd situation - because professionally per all work he associated with .. he ist really very competent in job he does. The case of the abandoned child. ... it just not the sort of thing you expect to hear of from this type.
I think then more "
guilty denial und guiltiest anger possibly" that he been so stupid. Professional arrogance perhaps fuel this denial too.
I try to understand situations beyond what press tell me.. if possible.
We not unsympathetic to the late Nathan Owen either - whose family will be so sad just now.. We just know there more to it than lyrically reported. in favour of that child .. but that does not mean we have no empathy/sympathy .. because we do as parents/foster parents of wilful teenagers. You have to be firm.. friendly ,, not dictating but steering und prodding them in the right direction without making them feel "awkward"
It really ist 24/7 life sentence just as my parents warned me.
Just because G Mcann does not appear to show emotion in public does not mean much. It not sign that this man help conceal an accidental death.
No evidence of doping in twins reported. If I had hair or tissue .. I could test for this und I would be able to establish very quickly quantity absorbed und over what period of time. That part of my trialling work.

It as normal a test as reciting the alphabet to a teacher of tots.
Some people appear calm when world crumble around them. Ist rich tapestry of human life with very differing ways of handling bereavement und stresses.
It not a realistic enough sign to me that he accomplice in covering up some incident to a daughter who look very image of him. She her Papa's daughter from those photos alright - despite some tabloid innuendo to contrary. You can even see the mother in her too. in the colouring und one profile photo of mother beside early released photo of the child at her play.
I just see a man in guilty denial of leaving children asleep in hotel room und the worst unimaginable happening.
But my profession? Ja.. there ist "arrogance" within it too.
Ted ist now in later 40s. Gerry is 39 years. In their training era - especially in UK.. I think "arrogance" set in as these "cream of crop" to reach Uni.
Ach.. Europe .. we have same competition for training places - with the top crop making to med school.
Jeff.. I orignally train as medic .. always wanted to research medicine though.
The unfortunate incident just brought forward by few years und I kept busy in the recovery period by studying hard to pick up reins of new career path. It helped me. I was busy .. but not too busy - which ist something I must get across to Claire at this time in her life. I phone her. She OK-ish. I will call her again. She need an "ear" und I will try to call her whenever she signal to me or Ted a need as well as the random chats to check she OK und coping. But I digress as I always do
But back to what I was saying about the inherent arrogance within the UK medical profession..
I train initially in medicine. I come to UK for visit to cousin Charles (IG). I am in his local pub. Some local ask me what I study. I reply. They over me like a licking rash und place me on some weird pedestal as "super clever"
I never able to understand .. und to this day.. I still not understand that.
Back home it was "so what.. all students unite und alike und right rebels

" We held engineering und finance students in higher esteem .. as they responsible for the worth und progress of the nation.
But UK has odd ideas as a nation.
I can say that as someone not brought up here und get aways with it
So perhaps Gerry McCann has the arrogance of profession .. but over-ridden with sheer guilty denial of the stupidity of leaving the children whilst he went for his evening meal.
But.. having said that. He in holiday resort which supposedly safe - und we see the dropped guard all too often when some relax far too much. You would be amazed at what we observe in the season. It really scares us.
In charitable mode .. we concede this party of holidaying medics became oblivious to dangers und there ist also a danger when you go on holiday as a group like this too .. as in singleton/dinky lifestyle indulgences.
Und you cannot afford this when you have children. They have to come as
priorityI lose count of number of meals we have as room service whilst our children sleep. I like room service. It "luxury" to me. Not having to dress up for dinner.. not having to be on best "social" behaviour.. not having to cook for a mini-army.. being waited on... having the dishes cleared away for me..
You have room with balcony und have the table set over nice view.. und it just
bliss
Had I been in this party.. I think I choose the room service for some nights und the nanny service for others - und even with the nanny service .. I still check on my children after every three mouthfuls of food.
I not really settle like that ... so I do not do the "with pals hols!" anyway.
But we see so much here.. so we do not condemn as "derangedly incompetent".. but "silly.. duped.. naive.. but also in an kind of arrogant und also guilt ridden denial"
I do not think "accident/cover up/complicity und most extreme loyalty test of pals" but this very subjective as per our training .. it just "normal reaction" to treat.. to preserve the life.. to fight God und the Devil for it. To prove we can work the better miracle without a "legend/lore/myth". ?
If your own./... you try to move heaven und earth to keep them alive. You are like Claire.. numb with shock .. when you lose a loved one. That couple .. their pals.. they could not act
so.. so.. callously without a big give aways I cannot really now work out who did what.. when as we have so much daft speculations whch seem to be a right melange of Harold Robins.. Syd Sheldon.. Higgins Clarke.. Chandler.. King.. Christie.. Marsh.. Osmington Mills .. Greene.. Graham... whatever.. to extent the head just whirls.
my most sensible pal in virtual world wrote:
b. In the number of phone-in shows on the radio I am staggered by the number of people who say they have done the same thing and others who say they would do it again :o The general gist of their rationale is that this was a one in a million occurence that is unlikely to happen to them. These supposedly reasonable people appear oblivious to the fact that it is not through fear of abduction that one doesn't leave young children unattended but because of the chance that one of the other dozen or so things a child left alone in a strange flat can do to harm him/herself may happen.
Oh ja.. It what I get at. So many leave the kids. To date .. we see parents leave kids canoeing alone in Derwentwater..
Swimming way out into the lake
Oblivious to current.. undertow
Walking very close to edge of sheer drop
Leaving on the greens at Bowness whilst they go to chippy kiosk..
Letting the children walk beyond sight on the Fells und then panicking when they get lost..
Letting children.. j-walk..ride bikes und other vehicles without adequate supervision or lighting..
But the main daftness remain..
We see the kiddy fiddler close to home.
But they prey on holiday resorts .. like von Aesch who killed Ylenia from my home Kanton.
But why so silly..to leave a child alone?
But close to home.. a child can vomit.. ( we been there too many time..)
Have nightmares
. I have been there with Zoe und Andrew in particular. I should not harp that we adopted as this somehow isolate them... but their pasts were not nice und we thank God each day that these two survive und are healthy feisty kids with hopeful promise ahead.
Fall from cot or pram. I did so myself as baby . Some say I land on head und this explain much
Choke on sweet ..
Wake up.. wander.. panic if mama or papa not there for them.
It why we have room service if they too tired to dine with us.. und they sleep after very light supper.
BUT to bring back to the quad bike..
This bloke knew he was breaking law..
The children were exposed to a very severe danger on a road known to be a danger.
In charitable mode ..am prepared to accept a cave into pester power just as I can accept a "dropped guard on a holiday.."
But he every bit if not more incompetent as the McCann couple as regard exposing a small tot to danger.