Safe Speed Forums

I bought a car from my local Mazda dealer back in November which subsequently developed a serious electrical fault. The car was handed back to them in late November and they sourced me a replacement (which is great). The original car had my cherished number on which was transfered to the new car. I never got a V5 document for the first car and forgot about it........

Until I got a penelty notice for failing to tax it. WTF!! I got an £80 fine, reduced to £40 if paid before the end of this month. I wrote to them explaining that I no longer own the vehicle and that it has been off the road since November awaiting repairs from Mazda UK - my local Mazda dealer have also confired this in writing. Problem is, I am still the registered keeper, but I never got the V5 document when the cherished number was taken off the car. I have since faxed DVLA Swansea informing them of the new keeper/owner.

I got a letter back from the enforcement office in Preston saying that they sent a V5 document out in January and that, therefore, I am still liable for the fine. My time, being a deputy head teacher, is far more expensive than a £40 fine, so I just posted a letter to that effect stapled to a £40 cheque.

That was a week ago, then this morning I got a letter back with the cheque returned saying that the handwriting on the cheque was not clear and that I would have to re-write it and initial it. WTF!!! I've written cheques out for the last 18 years with that handwiriting and never had a cheque returned yet!!!!! They also said that if they did not hear back from me within 19 days of the original notice, a county court judgement would be issued.

I sent another cheque for £40 today be recorded 1st class post!!

Are the DVLA just taking the p**s here? They don't take phone calls at the enforcement office in Preston. Are they just trying to stitch me up here??

I can understand how you feel and what the DVLA are doing is disgraceful. Did you receive a renewal notice for the car that was given back to the Mazda dealer?

I’m of the opinion that this government and its departments are trying to make life as difficult as possible for today’s motorist. And in my opinion they are taking the piss. I’d still take issue with them if I were you.

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Useless laws weaken necessary laws.

The gov are making life miserable for everyone.
Make an appointment at the hospital.
New computer system.
Doesn't work.
Cannot make one using pen and paper, the new system has taken over.
The new system doesn't work.
Have to give my passwork.
Wrong.
Issue new one.
Give that.
Wrong.
Give old one.
Right.
Make appointment.
Get told time/date.
Letter arrives to confirm.
Different time/date.
Ring-up to query.
Have to give password.
Wrong.
Give new one.
Right.
System crashes.
Back to square one.
Make appointment at psychiatric clinic for treatment of appointment-induced-stress.
Tried to phone the primary care trust patient advice line.
No answer, leave message.
Call never returned.
Now, this would be hilarious, except that it is what we are going to have in the near future for EVERY .gov service.
On inet:
Connect to Gov Gateway.
Insert user id and password.
Password not recognised.
Go into Gov Gateway through the Direct.gov site, password recognised.
It would be funny.....in another world.
These are gov sites. Like the jobcentreplus site, that has job adverts for "female escorts"

You could not invent some of this.

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The world runs on oil, period. No other substance can compete when it comes to energy density, flexibility, ease of handling, ease of transportation. If oil didn’t exist we would have to invent it.”

56 years after it was decided it was needed, the Bedford Bypass is nearing completion. The last single carriageway length of it.We have the most photogenic mayor though, always being photographed doing nothing

Well I hope they have vacancies for male escorts as well, because if not then that is blatant sexism

On a more serious note, although I personally see nothing wrong if a person wants to be whore (sorry, escort)...if the job centre ever told my old lady she had to take a job as a whore or lose benefits then I would personally send the individual concerned to hospital for a very long time.

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What makes you think I'm drunk officer, have I got a fat bird with me?

Soz to post it here Dave but I recieved this today and instantly thought of your post and problems with the autorities.


Dear Minister,

I'm in the process of renewing my passport but I am a total loss to understand or believe the hoops I am being asked to jump through.

How is it that Bert Smith of T.V. Rentals Basingstoke has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a satellite dish from them back in 1994, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date?

How come that nice West African immigrant chappy who comes round every Thursday night with his DVD rentals van can tell me every film or video I have had out since he started his business up eleven years ago, yet you still want me to remind you of my last three jobs, two of which were with contractors working for the government?

How come the T.V. detector van can tell if my T.V. is on, what channel I am watching and whether I have paid my licence or not, and yet if I win the government-run lottery they have no idea I have won or where I am and will keep the bloody money to themselves if I fail to claim in good time. Do you people do this by hand?

You have my birth date on numerous files you hold on me, including the one with all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 30-odd years. It's on my health insurance card, my driver's licence, on the last four passports I've had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the planes and boats over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done every ten years and the electoral registration forms I have to complete, by law, every time our lords and masters are up for re-election.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, I was born in Maidenhead on the 4th of March 1957, my mother's name is Mary, her maiden name was Reynolds, my father's name is Robert, and I'd be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and the day I die!

I apologise Minister. I'm obviously not myself this morning. But between you and me, I have simply had enough! You mail the applicationto my house, then you ask me for my address. What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthals working there? Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to activate the Fifth Reich for God's sake! I just want to go and park my weary backside on a sunny, sandy beach for a couple of week's well-earned rest away from all this crap.

Well, I have to go now, because I have to go to back to Salisbury and get another copy of my birth certificate because you lost the last one AND to the tune of 60 quid! What a racket THAT is!! Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day? But nooooo, that'd be too damn easy and maybe make sense. You'd rather have us running all over the place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some tosser to confirm that it's really me on the goddamn picture - you know... the one where we're not allowed to smile in in case we look as if we are enjoying the process!

Hey, you know why we can't smile? 'Cause we're totally jacked off! I served in the armed forces for more than 25 years including over ten years at the Ministry of Defence in London. I have had security clearances which allowed me to sit in the Cabinet Office, five seats away from the Prime Minister while he was being briefed on the first Gulf War and I have been doing volunteer work for the British Red Cross ever since I left the Services. However, I have to get someone "important" to verify who I am -- you know, someone like my doctor... who, before he got his medical degree 6 months ago WAS LIVING IN PAKISTAN...

Yours sincerely,

An Irate British Citizen.

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

That would actually be quite humorous if it wasn't true.

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What makes you think I'm drunk officer, have I got a fat bird with me?

How about this one then...


HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2029

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world Mexifornia, formerly known as California . White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language. In the United Kingdom white minorities have given up all hope of having English recognized at all.

Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036. Ewan Blair hopes to be crowned Pope by the end of the year.

Royal Mail raises price of first class stamp to £17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only and collections to once a month

85-year £75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of the English drops to 250 lbs, the Scottish still at a all time high.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Scotland executes last remaining conservative.

High Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

New Motoring law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

Parliament authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

Prime Minster sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Any better? (Wasn't me who made it up BTW) Can anyone think of more?

Awe come on - admit at least one of them made ya laff

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

Fifth generation MRI scanners prove male brain like formation in skull is merely a decorative addition and in fact the male of the species is entirely controlled by the smaller lizard brain found slightly left of the right testicle. This explains the inability to multi task especially when wearing tight underpants