Safe Speed Forums

Waiting in a layby ready to catch speeding drivers, a police officer sees a
car puttering along the A22 at well under the 30 mile per hour limit.

Says he to himself: "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"
So he turns on his twos and blues and pulls the driver over.

Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies, two in the
front seats and three in the back...wide eyed and white as ghosts.

The driver, obviously confused, says to him "Officer, I don't understand, I
was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?"

"Madam," the officer replies, "you weren't speeding, but you should know
that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."

"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly,
twenty-two miles an hour!" .......the old woman says a bit proudly.

The Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that A22 is
the road number, not the speed limit.

A bit embarrassed, the woman grins and thanks the officer for pointing out
her error.

"But before I let you go, Madam, I have to ask, is everyone in this car OK?
These women seem awfully shaken, and they haven't made a sound this whole
time," the officer asks.

"Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer. We've just come off the A120."

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

Nice one Grabs

I'll have to see if I can come up with one...

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The views expressed in this post are personal opinions and do not necessarily represent the views of Safe Speed.
You will be branded a threat to society by going over a speed limit where it is safe to do so, and suffer the consequences of your actions in a way criminals do not, more so than someone who is a real threat to our society.

Not heard that one in a while ...

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Safe Speed for Intelligent Road Safety through proper research, experience & guidance.

yep the old ones are still the best ....

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My views do not represent Safespeed but those of a driver who has driven for 39 yrs, in all conditions, at all times of the day & night on every type of road and covered well over a million miles, so knows a bit about what makes for safety on the road,what is really dangerous and needs to be observed when driving and quite frankly, the speedo is way down on my list of things to observe to negotiate Britain's roads safely, but I don't expect some fool who sits behind a desk all day to appreciate that.

Lot of these involve little old ladies ( so if there's any little old ladies reading, please -it's not personal).
Little old lady buys a powerful car and takes it for a drive in fast traffic. Suddenly she smells a nasty smell . She takes it back to garage, who test drive it with no result. She return time and time again, till head salesman goes out with her. After a hairraising trip on the M1 at 90MPH, she turns to salesman"there it si ,can you smell it ". "Madam" ,he replies " I'm not just smelling it, but sitting in it ".

And the one that will NOT endear me to Scousers ( Courtesy of Honest John)

The Ferrari F1 Team fired their entire Pit- Crew Yesterday.

The announcement was followed by Ferrari's Decision to take advantage of a scheme to hire unemployed youths from Liverpool.

The decision to hire them was brought on by a recent documentary on how they were able to remove a set of car wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's existing crew can only do it in 8.4 seconds.

This was thought to be an excellent yet bold move by Ferrari
Management, as most races are won & lost in the pits, and Ferrari would have an advantage over every team.

However Ferrari expectations were easily exceeded, as during the crew's first practice session, not only were "da boyz from Bootle" able to change the tyres in under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they had resprayed, rebadged, and sold the car to the McLaren Team for four dozen Stellas and a gramme of Charlie

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lets bring sanity back to speed limits.
Drivers are like donkeys -they respond best to a carrot, not a stick .Road safety experts are like Asses - best kept covered up ,or sat on

I don't know about a gramme of Charlie. The version I read some time back suggested that the price paid by McLaren included some rather tasty photos of Lewis Hamilton's bird in the shower.

Best wishes all,
Dave.

Dave -that was the modern ,cleaned up version . As was lewis bird. Oh- was that a Parrot /Macaw /budgie or a female ?

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lets bring sanity back to speed limits.
Drivers are like donkeys -they respond best to a carrot, not a stick .Road safety experts are like Asses - best kept covered up ,or sat on